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Jeremy and Jaime's spaceOur Adventure Into Parenthood
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28 octobre A Month OldLandon was officially one month old yesterday! He had his doctor appointment on Monday and he now weighs 9 pounds, which puts him at the 50th percentile. Such a little guy! While I was there they gave me the swine flu shot, since Landon is too young to get it but it'll be passed on through his eating. I have searched all over our county looking to get a regular flu shot and there are none available for me - the only place that has them that I know of is the health department and they are only giving them to kids right now. So yesterday morning I took Lucas to get his regular flu shot. They give them starting at 8 a.m. so we got there right at 8 and the waiting room was already filled! I was so stressed out, trying to handle 2 kids by myself. They had a sign on the wall just for mothers with kids like mine ("Parents must control their kids at all times"). Of course, a 3-year-old will not sit still for very long, and we made 2 trips to the bathroom and several trips to the water fountain where I had to lift up Lucas in one arm while holding Landon in the other arm. So needless to say, I was sweaty and looking like a frazzled mother. While we were there, a mother brought in her son, who was in a wheelchair and had some jerky movements. Lucas looked at him and kinda laughed and then ran off to go get water. I was mortified because I didn't know how to react - he's too young to know to make fun of somebody and he has a good heart, and he was probably laughing just because he thought the boy was goofing around or something. I didn't know what to say to him if he had asked me why the boy was in a wheelchair and I hoped the mom hadn't seen. Then I thought about the whole situation and it kinda put things in perspective. Here I was all stressed about my 2 perfectly healthy kids when I should be thankful that Lucas is able to run around. I talked to Jeremy later about it, and he agreed that Lucas was too young to know to make fun of somebody, but we thought if he ever did ask, then I would just explain to him that everyone is different - some people are tall, some people have dark hair, some people have owies, etc. If there's anybody who can tell me the right answer, I'm open! So anyways, Lucas took his shot like a man, didn't cry at all, and then we went off to preschool. He did get a good behavior sticker, which I was thankful for after last week! He'll get to dress up tonight for family night at grandma and grandpa's, and then tomorrow at school they're having a fall celebration which I'll stay for, and then we're taking him trick or treating at Beckie's neighborhood on Saturday - his first trick-or-treating! Landon did so much better sleeping last night. I went to bed at 9:45 p.m. and he didn't wake up until 4 a.m.! He had kinda moved around a couple times during the night but I just fed him in bed and went back to sleep, so I actually feel rested today! 16 octobre Adjusting to our new lifeWhat an adjustment it has been! If it was this hard the first time around I must’ve blocked it from my memory. Landon is almost 3 weeks old, which means I have 3 weeks before I go back to work full time. I am dreading how I am going to be able to handle that while going on little sleep. If we could afford it, I’d only work part time, but that’s not going to happen, especially since I’m not getting a military paycheck anymore. Jeremy’s liking that I’ve been baking and cooking lately. I have made pumpkin bread and banana bread and tuna salad and roast, which is amazing for anyone who knows me and that I can’t cook! Landon is a good baby, rarely cries except for when the wet wipe touches him during a diaper change. Of course, I don’t really give him a chance to cry since he’s held 24/7. The first week he was home, I was so sleep-deprived and emotional it was insane. At one point, when I walked past Jeremy I must’ve hit his foot or something because he said “ow.” I took the dirty diaper I had in my hand and threw it at the door about a foot from his head and started crying and said “I’m out of here!” before I stomped off outside to get the newspaper. He said, “All I said was ‘ow’” and I told him, “It was how you said it!” Luckily the hormones have leveled off a bit, but I’m still emotional a lot. Everything can just be so overwhelming at times, and it seems even more so when I don’t get enough sleep! Right now I’m just listening to the little animal sounds he makes and him tooting! That first week home from the hospital we took Lucas shopping for winter clothes and just as we were leaving Edinburgh, about an hour away, Landon started crying to be fed. So we pulled over in the McDonald’s parking lot so I could feed him. As soon as we took off his diaper to change him, he sprayed my door and window, which he tended to do a lot that first week! It was like as soon as he was exposed to air, he would pee! I gave a little yell and covered him with my hand, and he must’ve been saving up a lot of pee for the occasion because it was never-ending! Then, about 5 minutes from the house, Lucas threw up in the back seat, all over the door, his car-seat, and himself. My poor baby, he kept saying, “But I coughed in my arm and I still got yucky all over!” (He has been learning the proper way to cough and sneeze in the crook of his elbow, and he’s been learning at school to do that so nobody gets sick). All Jeremy and I could do was look at each other and laugh about the whole situation of being parents and probably plenty more episodes like this to come! Landon has his days and nights mixed up, so he sleeps all day and is wide awake at night, usually between 1-3 a.m. And even during the day I can only put him down in his swing for a short time before he starts making noises like he’s going to cry, so I’m lucky to get something to eat and a shower. And he’ll eat for hours in the middle of the night! So we try to sleep in the morning and take a late afternoon nap when possible. I said this time around I would sleep when he does, but it’s hard to just fall asleep in the middle of the day. And poor Lucas, he just loves being a big brother and is so attentive and excited when Landon is awake, but he has been acting up since he doesn’t get as much attention from us. When I picked him up from preschool yesterday he pushed a girl, and I asked his teacher if he has been acting out more, and she said she’s noticed that he has been wanting more attention, but she went thru the same thing with her kids. I’m trying hard to give him attention, too, but it’s so hard when it seems like I’m always feeding Landon. Jeremy’s been great at holding Landon whenever he can, and last night Lucas and I spent some time playing together and he was acting his normal happy self. But otherwise he’s been talking back to me and he thinks it’s hilarious to mimic everything I say. Part of it is probably the toddler age, but he was never this naughty to me until Landon was born. It doesn’t help that patience has never been my strong point, so I’m hoping this doesn’t last long. This Saturday Jeremy will spend the whole day with him while I throw Beckie her baby shower, and then on Sunday we’re taking him to Montgomery Farms to pick out pumpkins, which he’s excited about. So all in all, it’s been an exhausting few weeks, but the few times when I’m holding Landon in one arm and Lucas is snuggling next to me on the other side make it worthwhile!
28 septembre The Birth of Landon (Part 2)I had never felt such pain in my life. My doctor came in and he pretty much said the baby was coming, which I could tell by the severity of the contractions increasing and the feeling of pressure even more so. The original plan was for Jeremy's sisters to be able to experience the birth this time, and Beckie was still on the road, but it all happened so fast that it ended up being just Jeremy and his mom. I probably gouged out their hands and hurt their ears, but luckily it was over so quickly - I think Jeremy said it just took me 3 pushes - his head, shoulders and his body - and he was out. I was completely exhausted and I was so shaky I couldn't even hold him myself. I don't even remember him crying, but they said he did. And so Landon Elijah Toppe was born at 2:03 p.m. and weighed 7 pounds, 6.5 ounces and was 21 inches long! He has my chin, and everything else he looks like Jeremy and Lucas. The look on Lucas's face when he got to see him for the first time was so precious - he just seemed so proud and in awe. He went and kissed Landon on his head. When I started nursing Landon an hour later, Lucas said, "Mommy, why is your shirt off?!" and Beckie pointed out that I could either keep hiding it or teach him, so I explained that it was how Landon drank his milk. Lucas said, "Mommy, Landon is eating your bobe!" ("Bobe" is what he calls boobs). He's so funny. Of course, I could tell it was also going to be a struggle with Lucas - he didn't have his usual 2-hour nap, so he was already extremely tired, and just the events of the day and the fact that I couldn't hold him were really hard. Hospitals are hard for anyone to be in, let alone a 3-year-old. We're just going to have make sure to find time to give especially to him, and for me and Lucas too since he's such a mommy's boy. Landon has been mostly sleeping. When we went to the nursery to give him his first bath, the nurse told us that he gave them a scare - his respiratory rate went down to 5-6 breaths per minute, when it's supposed to be at least 25-30, and he turned blue, but they were able to stimulate him back. They kept him under observation and he's been hooked up to monitors with wires everywhere, which was scary and stressful, but his pediatrician came today and took him off. They said when a birth happens that fast, it can be traumatic, and it's common for that to happen. He's really taken to Jeremy, and Jeremy is so good with him, that maybe he'll end up being a daddy's boy! He already had his first professional photos today. We go home tomorrow, and it will be so nice to be in our own environment. Although it's nice having all this food being brought to me! The Birth of Landon (Part 1)So the "false labor" that I thought I was having Sunday morning obviously turned out to be true! Later that morning, I somehow got Jeremy off Mafia Wars on Facebook, and we decided to take Lucas downtown to walk through Chautauqua and along the river to feed ducks. At that point (about 10:30 a.m.) I still had contractions, but nothing regular or patterned - some would be 9 minutes apart, then 7 minutes, then a lot longer, and almost all lasted under 45 seconds and just uncomfortable. As we walked longer, the contractions started to get worse, but still nothing that made me sure it was for real. I think I talked to Beckie around 11:30 a.m. and said she might want to start heading our way just in case, but we were still walking around. We took Lucas to a kids craft booth and I had a contraction there, and a lady tried getting the paramedics to pick me up in a golf cart to take me to the hospital. I insisted on walking and told them I had been having these contractions for hours and it was no big deal, plus I wasn't delivering at the local hospital. Then the contractions started to instantly get closer together and more painful - about 4 minutes apart, and as we were making the long walk back to the car, I had to stop several times and one brought tears to my eyes. It just went downhill and fast from there - very painful contractions and not far apart. Poor Lucas was terrified in the back seat, saying, "Mommy, don't cry!" and it was just awful because I couldn't do anything to make him feel better. At this time it was about 12:30 p.m. Jeremy called his mom to meet us at the highway intersection to pick up Lucas and then we flew down to the hospital - normally about a 40 minute drive, but going 80-90 mph and weaving in and out of cars we made it in 1/2 hour or less. It was excruciating pain, and I was amazed at all the idiots out there on the road who either do not know or do not care that a horn blaring, hazards blinking and lights flashing mean to get off the road! Of course we were stuck behind slow cars, and finally I called 911 and Jeremy asked for a police escort....apparently there was no one available the whole way there. Jeremy's sister called the hospital ahead for us and told them to have my epidural ready. So there was a lot of screaming in pain going on in the car, and then I was worried about us getting there safely, so needless to say it was very stressful! When we got there at 1 p.m., Jeremy ran to get me a wheelchair and I was half hanging out the car screaming in pain and people were walking by and stopped to help. The only thing that ticked us off was they expected us to stop and register/do paperwork before bringing me there! I was obviously in so much pain that there was no way I could sit in an office and register so the ER people wheeled me up while they made Jeremy stay. And, because we always have such good luck, the elevator broke on my way up! I asked why it was taking so long and why the door wasn't opening and I heard one of the nurses call for maintenance and tell them there was a woman about to give birth! It seemed like forever but was probably just a minute or 2 and the doors finally opened and they wheeled me in. They checked me and I was already 8 cm dilated. All I kept asking for was my epidural, and they told me they had to give me an IV first and then get the labs done, etc. etc. Jeremy was up there soon and I could see by his face and the nurse's face that I might not be getting an epidural. I asked if there was anything else I could have for the pain if I couldn't have an epidural and they said no, it was too late.... 27 septembre False Labor?Well, it's 5 a.m. and I've been up for 2 hours with what I think may be contractions but after reading my books and looking online, could just be false labor. This is so frustrating! It started about an hour ago and the contractions lasted about 30-45 seconds every 10 minutes or so, but from what I read, they're supposed to last at least 45 seconds and I'm supposed to feel it all over, not just my lower abdomen like I am, or it's false labor. And my book says false labor is more likely to happen the second time around. If I'm going to lose sleep I want it to be for the real thing! It's kind of like deja vu all over again. We went walking in downtown Madison the night before I had Lucas 3 years ago to try to speed along the process, and so we tried it again this past evening - we took Lucas to the river and watched the ducks and threw rocks in. When I had contractions with Lucas I woke up at 3 a.m. and couldn't sleep, but at least those turned out to be real! We told Lucas we were taking him back to the river in the morning to feed the ducks some bread, and then we planned on taking him to Montgomery Farms to look for pumpkins and other fun stuff, so I'm hoping to get to do at least that before this all happens. Beckie and I both predicted he would be born on the 27th, so we'll see... |
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